"What are you doing here?"- Buffy
"Look..."- Spike
"Five words or less."- Buffy
[counts on his fingers] "Out for a walk."- Spike
[pauses]
"Bitch."- Spike

"How's that cramp, Spike? Still bothering you?"- Tara
"What? Oh, yeah."- Spike
"Maybe you, uh, wanna put some ice on it."- Tara

"I had a muscle cramp. Buffy was, uh, helping."- Spike
"A muscle cramp... in your pants?"- Tara
"What? It's a thing."- Spike

"What can you tell me about Dracula?"- Riley Finn
"Dracula? Poncy bugger owes me £11, for one thing."- Spike

[Upon finding Spike trying to stake himself] "We've shared a lot here. You should have trusted me enough to do it for you."- Xander
"Xander."- Willow
"What? He wants to die, I wanna help..."- Xander
"It's ooky. We know him. We can't just let him poof himself."- Willow
"Oh, but you can. You know I'd drain you drier than the Sahara if I had half a chance."- Spike

"Ours is a forever love."- Angel
"I had a relationship with her, too."- Spike

"Okay, sleeping together is not a relationship."- Angel
"It is if you do it enough times."- Spike

" When I kill her, it'll be the greatest event since the crucifixion. And I should know, I was there. "- Big Ugly
"You were there? Oh, please. If every vampire who said he was at the crucifixion was actually there, it would've been like Woodstock."- Spike

"I oughta rip your throat out."- Big Ugly
"I was actually at Woodstock. That was a weird gig. I fed off a flower person and I spent the next six hours watchin' my hand move."- Spike

"Trust is for old marrieds, Buffy. Great love is wild and passionate and dangerous. It burns and consumes."- Spike

"Passions is on! Timmy's down the bloody well, and if you make me miss it, I'll..."- Spike
"You'll do what? Lick me to death?"- Giles

"You Englishmen are always so...Bloody hell! Sodding, blimey, shagging, knickers, bollocks, oh God! I'm English!" - Spike