"Still not sure why Blondie Ghost tagged along."- Gunn
"Not much choice really, is there? Can't drink, smoke, diddle my willy. Doesn't leave much to do other than watch you blokes stumble around playin' Agatha Christie."- Spike
"Yeah, remind me again how you ended up in the front seat."- Wesley
"Called shotgun, mate."- Spike
"Oh. I thought we were doing a weapons check."- Wesley
"Nothin' wrong with that. We may need these bad boys if we're goin' up against some Mexican Day of the Dead heart-suckin' monster."- Gunn
"Angel, the church we're looking for is about half a mile..."- Wesley
[Angel interrupts by pulling a screeching U-Turn]
"Always was a bit of a drama queen."- Spike

"What about her - If her organs have been liquefied?"- Gunn
[raises hand] "Flash fried in a pillar of fire, savin' the world. I got better."- Spike

[last lines]
"You got your soul back. How?"- Buffy
"It's what you wanted, right? It's-It's what *you* wanted, right? And-and now everybody's in here, talking. Everything I did, everyone I- and him. And it. The other... the thing... beneath... beneath you. It's here, too. Everybody... they all just tell me go. Go... to hell."- Spike
"Why? Why would you do that?"- Buffy
"Buffy, shame on you. Why does a man do what he mustn't? For her. To be hers. To be the kind of man who would nev- To be a kind of man. And she shall look on him with forgiveness... and everybody will forgive and love. And he will be loved. So everything's okay, right? C-can we rest now? Buffy? Can we rest?"- Spike

"This isn't a relationship. You don't need me. All you care about is lots of orgasms."- Anya
"Okay, remember how we talked about private conversations? How they're less private when they're in front of my friends?"- Xander
"Oh, we're not your friends. Go on."- Spike
"Please don't."- Giles

"In my head. The chip in my head."- Spike
"We're kind of in the middle of somethin'."- Warren
"Well, you can play holodeck another time. Right now, I'm in charge."- Spike
"Yeah, what are you gonna do if we don't especially feel like maybe playing your- What are - wait, what are you doing?"- Warren
[Spike rips Boba Fett action figure off its base]
"Examine my chip or else Mr. Fett here is the first to die."- Spike
"Hey! All - All right. Let's not - Let's not not do anything crazy here."- Jonathan
"That's a limited edition, 1979 mint condition Boba Fett."- Andrew
"All right, dude, chill. You can still make it right. You know you don't wanna do this."- Warren
"What I want is answers, nimrod!"- Spike
"Right. But you don't want to hurt the Fett... because, man, you're not comin' back from that! You know, you don't just do that and walk away."- Warren
"That right? Let's find out."- Spike
[about to rip head off of action figure]
"One sec - One second."- Warren

"I need you to take Spike for a few days."- Giles
"What?"- Xander
"What?"- Spike
"What?"- Anya
"I'm not stayin' with him."- Spike
"I have a friend who's coming to town, and I'd like us to be alone."- Giles
"Oh, you mean an orgasm friend?"- Anya
"Yes, that's exactly the most appalling thing you could have said."- Giles

"You can't tell me that there isn't anything there between you and me. I know you feel something."- Spike
"It's called revulsion. And whatever you think you're feeling it's not love. You can't love without a soul."- Buffy
"Oh, we can, you know. We can love quite well... if not wisely."- Drusilla

"I like how you talk to me like I can understand things. Everyone else is being all twitchy and secretive."- Dawn

"They're just trying to keep you safe, I expect."- Spike
I feel safe with you."- Dawn
[almost chokes] "Take that back!"- Spike

[after being trapped by the Initiative, thinking Buffy's behind it]
"I always worried what would happen when that bitch got some funding."- Spike

"You got no idea how rotten this feels."- Spike
"Oh, amazingly enough, I do. Yeah. Got my hand cut off a few years back. Line of duty. So believe me when I tell you I can feel your pain."- Lindsey
"Well, half of it anyway. I'll give ya that."- Spike

"You know what? I don't think you want us to let you go. Maybe we made it a little too comfy in here for ya."- Buffy
"Comfy? I'm chained in a bathtub drinkin' pig's blood from a novelty mug. Doesn't rate huge in the Zagat's guide."- Spike

[Glory is torturing Spike to find who the Key is] "The key. Here's the thing. It's that guy, on TV. What's his name."- Spike
[confused] "On the television?"- Glory
"On that show, the price show where they guess what stuff costs."- Spike
"The Price is Right?"- Murk
"Bob Barker!"- Jinx
[to Glory] "We will bring you Bob Barker! We will bring you the limp and beaten body of Bob Barker!"- Murk
"It is not Bob Barker you scabby morons! The key is new to this world and Bob Barker is as old as grit!"- Glory

"Is Antonio Banderas a vampire?"- Harmony
"No."- Spike
"Oh. Can I make him a vampire?"- Harmony
"No. Wait, on second thought, yeah. Go do that. Take your time. Do Melanie and the kids, as well."- Spike

"You're a dope."- Buffy
"I'm a what?"- Spike
"You're a dope, a-and a bonehead, and you're shirty."- Buffy
"Have you gone completely Carrot-top?"- Spike
"Do you see this? This may actually help me fight my war. This might be the key to everything and the reason I'm holding it is because of you. Because of the strength that you gave me last night. I am tired of defensiveness and-and weird mixed signals - You know what? I have Faith for that. Let's just get to the truth, here, okay? I don't know how you felt about last night, but I will not..."- Buffy
"Terrified."- Spike

[angrily] "What did you do?"- Buffy
"What I had to. I went back and I took care of it. It doesn't matter now. No one will ever find her."- Spike
[coming out of the police station] "Where'd they find her?"- Cop 1
"The river. She washed up half a mile from the cemetery."- Cop 2
"Oh, balls."- Spike

"Oh, you have got to be joking. What now?"- Spike
"It has to access the cerebral cortex via the optic nerve."- Giles
"Oh, bollocks. All the rubbish people keep sticking in my head, it's a wonder there's any room for my brain."- Spike
"I don't think it takes up that much space, do you?"- Giles

[Spike and Drusilla do not know Angel has lost his soul]
"Did you see any further? Do you know what happens to Angel?"-Spike
"Well, he moves to New York and tries to fulfill that Broadway dream. It's tough sledding, but one day he's working in the chorus when the big star twists her ankle."- Angelus
"You don't give up, do you?"- Spike
"As long as there's injustice in the world, as long as scum like you is walking... well, rolling the streets... I'll be around. Look over your shoulder. I'll be there."- Angelus

"How did you get in?"- Giles
"The door was unlocked. You might want to watch that, Rupert. Someone dangerous could get in."- Spike
"Or, someone formerly dangerous and currently annoying."- Buffy

[Dru has broken up with Spike]
"We killed a homeless man on this bench. Me and Dru. Those were good times."- Spike
[chuckling]
"You know, he begged for mercy, and, you know, that only made her bite harder."- Spike
"I guess you had to be there."- Buffy

"To make you a vampire they have to suck your blood. And then you have to suck their blood. It's like a whole big sucking thing. Mostly they're just gonna kill you."- Buffy

[the Judge demon is urged by Spike to burn all the goodness out of Angel who's turned into Angelus]
"Hurts, doesn't it?"- Spike
"Well, you know, it kinda itches a little."- Angelus
"Don't just stand there, burn him!"- Spike
[nothing happens]
"Gee, maybe he's broken."- Angelus
"What the hell is going on?"- Spike
[letting Angelus go] "This one cannot be burned. He's clean."- The Judge
"Clean? You mean he's..."- Spike
"There's no humanity in him."- The Judge
"Couldn't have said it better myself."- Angelus
"Angel?"- Drusilla
"Yeah, baby, I'm back."- Angelus

[to the remains of the Order of Aurelius]
"Do you know what I find works real good with Slayers? Killing them."- Spike

[Spike is a human] "Oh, uh, quickly. I'm the very spirit of vexation. What's another word for "gleaming"? It's a perfectly perfect word as many words go but the bother is nothing rhymes, you see."- Spike

"Hey, big guy. Need another car. 'Fraid this last one ended up in the drink."- Spike
[pause]
"Spike..."- Angel
"Look at you."- Spike
"Spike, just turn around and walk away."- Angel
"You're a..."- Spike
"Spike!"- Angel
"You're a bloody puppet!"- Spike

[Joyce and Dawn are staying with Spike]
"Just don't break anything. And don't make a lotta noise. Passions is comin' on."- Spike
"Passions? Oh, do you think Timmy's really dead?"- Joyce
"Oh, no, no. She can just sew him back together. He's a doll, for God's sake."- Spike
"Ah, what about the wedding? I mean, there's no way they're gonna go through with that."- Joyce

"Think of the happy. If we don't find what we're lookin' for, we're facing an apocalypse."- Xander
excitedly] "Really! You're not just sayin' that?"- Spike

"Are you insane? We're supposed to kill the bitch, not leave gag gifts in her friends' beds."- Spike
"But, Spike, the bad teacher was going to restore Angel's soul."- Drusilla
"What if she did? If you ask me, I find myself preferring the old Buffy-whipped Angelus. This new, improved one is not playing with a full sack. I love a good slaughter as much as the next bloke, but his little pranks will only leave us with one incredibly brassed-off Slayer."- Spike
"Don't worry, roller boy. I've got everything under control."- Angelus
[a Molotov cocktail smashes on the table, setting the place afire]

"You sing the sweetest little song. Won't you sing for me, hmm? Don't you love me anymore?"- Drusilla
[the image pulls back to Drusilla talking to a little canary lying dead in a birdcage]
"Darling, I heard a funny thing just now. Lucius tells me that you went out on the hunt the other night."- Spike
"My tummy was growly, and you were out."- Drusilla
[to the bird]
"Come on."- Drusilla
[whistles]
"I'll pout if you don't sing."- Drusilla
"You, um, meet anyone? Anyone interesting, like Angel?"- Spike
"Angel."- Drusilla
"Yeah. So what might you guys have talked about, then? Old times, childhood pranks? It's a little off, you two so friendly, him being the enemy, and all that."- Spike

[still to the bird] "I'll give you a seed if you sing."- Drusilla
"The bird's dead, Dru. You left it in a cage, and you didn't feed it, and now it's all dead, just like the last one."- Spike
[Drusilla cowers and whines] "

[Spike tells Willow about his breakup with Drusilla]
"She wouldn't even kill me. She just left. She didn't even care enough to cut off my head or set me on fire. I mean, is that too much to ask? You know, some little sign that she cared? It was that truce with Buffy that did it. Dru said I'd gone soft. Wasn't demon enough for the likes of her. And I told her it didn't mean anything I was thinking of her the whole time, but she didn't care. So, we got to Brazil and she was... she was just different. I gave her everything. Beautiful jewels, beautiful dresses with beautiful girls in them, but nothing made her happy. And she would flirt. I caught her on a park bench making out with a Chaos Demon. Have you ever seen a Chaos Demon? They're all slime and antlers; they're disgusting. She only did it to hurt me. So I said, "I'm not putting up with this anymore." And she said, "Fine." And I said, "Yeah, I've got an unlife, you know." And then she said... she said we could still be friends. God, I'm so unhappy."- Spike
"There, there."- Willow
"I mean, "Friends." How could she be so cruel?"- Spike

"Me and Dru, we're movin' in. Now, any of you wanna test who's got the biggest wrinklies 'round here, step on up."- Spike
[to The Anointed One]
"I'll do your Slayer for you. But you keep your flunkies from tryin' anything behind my back. Deal?"- Spike
[the Anointed One nods]
"I can't see her. The Slayer. I can't see. It's dark where she is. Kill her. Kill her, Spike. Kill her for me?"- Drusilla
"It's done, baby."- Spike
"Kill her for princess?"- Drusilla
"I'll chop her into messes."- Spike

"Are we feeling better, then?"- Spike
"I'm naming all the stars."- Drusilla
"You can't see the stars, love. That's the ceiling. Also it's day."- Spike
"I can see them. But I've named them all the same name, and there's terrible confusion."- Drusilla