[on phone] "Himalayas? I thought she was in South America."- Angel
"We got a branch in Tibet? How 'bout a couple of Sherpas?"- Spike
"Alright, look - What do you mean she's not on this plane? You just said - Astral projection? Well, is there any way to get her astral to L.A.? Giles, this is an emergency."- Angel

[Spike opens the door for Buffy]
"What are you doing?"- Buffy
"I... Uh, it was... I wasn't thinking."- Spike
"What is this?"- Buffy
"Oh, don't get your knickers twisted, I was..."- Spike
"What is this? The late-night stakeout, the bogus suspects, the flask. Is this a date?"- Buffy
"A d- please. A date. You are completely off your bird. I mean- Do you want it to be?"- Spike
"Uhh. Oh, my God."- Buffy

"Is it safe? Has Buffy gotten to you yet? I saw her patrolling just now... with a stake. She won't give up until she's killed me to death."- Harmony
"Buffy's looking for you?"- Spike
"Of course. That's why I'm on the lam. Didn't you hear? I'm totally her arch-nemesis."- Harmony
"Is that right? I must've missed the memo."- Spike
"There was a mem- Spike, oh my God, this is like a real emergency."- Harmony

"Looks like an old vineyard."- Buffy
"An evil vineyard, huh."- Kennedy
"Like Falcon Crest."- Spike

[thinking he's still a ghost, Spike runs into a door]
"Bugger, that hurt!"- Spike

"So what sort of damage are we lookin' at if Illyria Chernobyls on us?"- Spike
"Conservative guess, several city blocks."- Wesley
"And what about unconservative?"- Angel
"Rand and McNally will have to redraw their maps."- Wesley

[reading from Giles' notes] "They had to be certain the Slayer would protect it with her life. So they sent the key to her... in human form. In the form of a sister." Huh. I guess that's you, nibblet."- Spike

[after Drogyn has given Spike a look because of his question asking] "What's your favorite color? What's your favorite song? Who's the goalkeeper for Manchester United? And how many fingers am I holding up? You wanna kill me. Try. I don't have time for your quirks."- Spike

[last lines; the gang faces an endless onslaught of demons]
"And in terms of a plan?"- Spike
"We fight."- Angel
"Bit more specific?"- Spike
"Well, personally, I kinda wanna slay the dragon. Let's go to work."- Angel

"Harmony just pulled me out of a very promising poker game down in Accounts Receivable, so this better be good. Oh, and, by the way, all the guys down there agree that astronauts don't stand a chance against cavemen, so don't even start."- Spike

"Get out of here, all of you. Unless you want to end up all dead and useless."- Spike
"What are you gonna do?"- Kennedy
"What I do best."- Spike

"Dear Buffy. Hm. I'm still trying to decide the best way to send my regards."- Angelus
"Why don't you rip her lungs out? That might make an impression."- Spike
"Lacks... poetry."- Angelus
"Doesn't have to. What rhymes with lungs?"- Spike

[about Buffy] "I'd think you'd want to kill her. You've killed Slayers before."- Lydia
[steps forward] "Heard of me, have you?"- Spike
"I... wrote my thesis on you."- Lydia

"Do you two need to be alone or can we get on with the ouchy part?"- Spike

[chanting] "She will come for me. She will come for me."- Spike
[as The First] "No, I won't."- Buffy

[human Spike has told Cecily he loves her]
"I know I'm a bad poet, but I'm a good man. And all I ask is that - Is-is that you try to see me..."- Spike
"I do see you. That's the problem. You're nothing to me, William. You're beneath me."- Cecily

"Caught me fair and square, white hat. Guess there's nothin' to do now but go along quietly and pay my debt to society."- Spike

[bursts in with tarp over him; smoking] "Close the door!"- Spike
"Spike? You may want to give up these morning jogs."- Xander

"But she's not finished baking yet! I gotta wait 'til she's done baking. You know, 'til she finds herself. 'Cause that's the drill. Fine. I'm waitin' patiently, and meanwhile,"- Angel
[shouting]
"The Immortal's eatin' cookie dough!"- Angel
"Uh, Spike, is Angel crying?"- Andrew
"No."- Spike
[pause]
"Not yet."- Spike

"When do we destroy the world, already?"- Spike

"Magic shop, eh? All number of beasties between here and there. Bet they'd really go for a Little Red Riding Hood like you. That wouldn't set too well with big sister."- Spike
"I can take care of myself."- Dawn
[pause]
"You wanna come steal some stuff?"- Dawn
"Yeah, all right."- Spike

"And if Dru dies... your little Rebecca of Sunnyhell Farm and all her mates are spared her coming out party."- Spike

"You're a dope."- Buffy
"I'm a what?"- Spike
"You're a dope, a-and a bonehead, and you're shirty."- Buffy
"Have you gone completely Carrot-top?"- Spike
"Do you see this? This may actually help me fight my war. This might be the key to everything and the reason I'm holding it is because of you. Because of the strength that you gave me last night. I am tired of defensiveness and-and weird mixed signals - You know what? I have Faith for that. Let's just get to the truth, here, okay? I don't know how you felt about last night, but I will not..."- Buffy
"Terrified."- Spike

[as Xander walks in on Spike and invisible Buffy] "Spike? What are you doing?"- Xander
"What am I-... What does it look like I'm doing, you nit? I'm exercising, aren't I?"- Spike
[starts doing "push-ups"]
"Exercising? Naked? In bed?"- Xander
"A man shouldn't use immortality as an excuse to let himself go. You gotta keep fit for killing."- Spike
"Ya-huh."- Xander

[to Willow and Xander] "*Buffy* fights the forces of evil. You're her groupies."- Spike

[after Angel kills Hainsley by throwing a silver dish plate at him, Spike's ghostly head sticks out]
"Oh, bollocks."- Spike
[Hainsley's body falls to the floor]
"I was just getting warmed up."- Spike
That was you hitting me?"- Angel
"The last bit, yeah. Hainsley's been dead since he hit the table. Oh, come on. Had to get a few licks in, didn't I?"- Spike

"Just since you're all soulful now, I thought maybe, just maybe, you might've learned to open up a little. You know, talk? But I guess a leopard can't change his stripes."- Harmony
"Spots, you dink. Leopards have spots."- Spike
"Oh! Excuse me, Mr. Brainy. Thank you so much for sharing. Wow. What a breakthrough."- Harmony

"Buffy's a great mom. She takes good care of her little sis, like, um, when Dawn was hanging out too much in my crypt, Buffy put a right stop to it."- Spike
"I'm sorry, did you say..."- Doris
"Crib. Crib. He said crib. You know kids today and their buggin' street slang. "- Buffy